On election eve in 2008, a dear friend and I had an hour-long text exchange from our respective homes as we watched the results roll in. Around 8:30 p.m., we paused as I went to relax in a hot bath, after which we resumed our texts with celebratory emojis when we learned that our candidate had won. In the spirit of playful superstition, we recreate the conditions every four years, but because in 2016 our tradition failed us spectacularly, in 2020 she left bath salts on my doorstep for extra insurance. This obviously did the trick.
I was reminded of our inside joke the other day when I saw a tweet warning against bold huzzahs that The New Year Will Make Everything Better, lest our fate takes another cruel turn as it did in early '21, which had us looking around in shock and dismay just six days in. Rather than boldly declaring that the next spin round the sun will bathe us in vanquishing light, the humorous tweet recommends that we "tiptoe into '22 quietly, so nobody notices."
Personal ritual certainly has its role in navigating life – a prayer in the bathtub can never hurt – but time is the only thing we can reliably count on to carry us forward, and it doesn't serve us to bargain or argue with its pace. In between the past and future, we have endless opportunities to stay present for the truth of each moment. It's not always comfortable and it's not always how we'd choose it, but the more space we grant to presence, the more skilled we get in living there. As 2022 dawns, we will do what we can and what we need to remain as emotionally stable and physically healthy as possible. We'll continue to hold each other closely, whether in the safe bubble of close family and friends, behind the protection of KN95 masks, or in the light of the Zoom room.
A crucial tool for getting through hard times is to differentiate between circumstance and soul. In Song of Myself, the great American poet Walt Whitman wrote of "fitful events" and the "fever of doubtful news." He said, "these come to me days and nights and go from me again / but they are not the Me myself ... I have no mockings or arguments, I witness and wait."
Let's be like Walt. Witness and wait. We have time.
Happy New Year to each one of you, with love,
Annie